“Enthusiasm is common. Endurance is rare.”
Angela Duckworth, Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance
Called to Something More Real
The process of learning is rooted in tension. The tension between what you know and what you don’t know. Typically, we get comfortable with what we know and are reluctant to move beyond it. We settle into what’s familiar and this becomes our “normal.” But we hear the call of the unknown and it stirs our desire for something more. As athletes, coaches, and performers, we know we are made to take the leap from who we are right now and jump into the possibility of who we could be. Even though we are unsure what that will look like, and even less certain about what it will take to get there.
This is the risk of real development. You have to let go—let go of what you think you know, your attachments to familiarity, and your self-image—because things will get rocky. If you don’t let go, you’ll end up holding on tightly to the past, abandoning the leap into the future. You’ll settle for a lesser version of what you could be.
Why would we give up? Don’t we want to be better?
Discomfort Gets the Best of Us
We feel the tension of this in-between space. Between where you are now and where you want to be. It’s a process. And the arrival of where you want to be is not yet. Real development is a process of not yet.
This feels painful. It’s frustrating to let go of something that was “working” for you and begin something that is clunky. It makes us feel less than what we thought we were. We might feel unathletic, unintelligent, incompetent, or unskilled. What we prided ourselves on before might be under attack as we make this transition. The tension of not yet brings up anxieties and insecurities.
But what happens if instead of settling into the comfort of familiarity, we settle into the tension of the process? What would happen if we let go of our attachments to results, outcomes, and our self-image enough to endure the tension for a while?
Give Into Grit
Grit is what helps us persevere in this in-between space. When things feel unfinished, awkward, and confusing, grit helps us embrace the tension and lean into the process of not yet. This embracing of the tension and yielding to the process lets the growth take place. Our lives and performances become transformed.
Give it time. Keep showing up. Put your whole self into it. And let it unfold as it will.
